Leap of Faith...

Before beginning my job as the Program Director with the Vermont Youth Conservation Corps back in 2003, I learned that they were unsure about hiring me because of my lack of experience with grants. They actually hired someone else. He was local (I was living in MD at the time) and within a few weeks, he proved to be a poor fit. They called me. The President of the organization was very candid about his reservations in hiring me but after much direct and honest conversation, he announced that he was going to "take a leap of faith" and hire me. It's one neither of us regrets (despite there being some bumps in my journey at VYCC... I consider them "growing pains"). 

Today I gave my notice to leave my job as the Fieldwork Coordinator at the Senior Environment Corps. As I was driving away from the office, the term "Leap of Faith" popped back into my mind. 

I gave my notice for a few reasons. The first is that I feel like I've done all I can do there. It's not a challenge and I feel like I've grown the program as much as I can. It's time for new blood. I breathed a lot of life back into my region of the program over the past 3 3/4 years and now it's time to move on. It was never meant to be a permanent part-time job and it's now run its course. 

The second reason is that with my father in-law in treatment for his lung cancer and my only-child-husband having a have-to-do-it-in-person type job, I am ready for a job that I can do from anywhere so I can support my in-laws more often and the SEC isn't that. 

The final reason is that for the past several months, the powers that be at SNHU (my other part-time job where I've been for almost a year already!) have been working on a plan for me to work full-time. With my counterpart at SEC retiring in March, I didn't feel the time was right. But this past week, I was given a firm offer of full-time employment with SNHU and the option to start whenever I am ready. I don't have a salary or benefits package outline yet but I'm told I'll be "very happy" with it. They know what I need so it's not a total mystery to me but it's an untied loose end. 

And that's the reason that the term "Leap of Faith" popped to mind today. I don't have the last detail sorted out with SNHU so I feel a bit like I've jumped before the net is quite finished being assembled... But I feel confident that by the time I will need it, the net will be there. 

Then I started thinking that the term "Leap of Faith" had woven itself into my career years before the President of the VYCC ever used it with me. Back in my adventure education days, it was actually the name of one of the high elements on the ropes courses that I used to facilitate. It was an element that challenges mind and body in a number of ways. Typically it's a 25'-30' pole that one climbs up wearing a harness attached to a pulley system overhead. At the top of the pole, you have to put aside all fear and maneuver yourself so that you are standing on top of the pole with about a 7" diameter surface to stand on and nothing to hold on to while you wobble your way up there. Once stable, you dive and try to grab a trapeze (or similar item) thereby trusting the equipment and your belayer 100% - a leap of faith. 

I realized that every time I accepted a job on the other side of the country without being able to fully check it out, it was a leap of faith. When I quit my jobs to raise my brother's kids, it was a leap of faith. When I invited A to VT for a visit after just a few weeks of reconnecting over the phone, it was a leap of faith. 

Despite some more bumps in the journey (remember... "Growing pains") each and every one of these leaps have led me to a new adventure that I wouldn't trade. 

So here I stand, perched at the edge of the pole. A "last day of work" less than three weeks from now and a "first day of full-time work" still written in the sand (which is technically ground up stone, right?) and the nerves of "what if it crumbles" making me a little nauseous but the memory of all of the successful leaps in the past making me bold. 

For now, I will enjoy these next few weeks of work with the SEC. Say "see ya later" to my favorite volunteers and service partners (not goodbye because I'll be around!), enjoy the freedom of a few weeks of "only working 30 hours/week", and hope that our plan of recharging in the nooks of Mount Desert Island at the end of September comes through... And I'll remember to breath and enjoy it all because life moves pretty fast.........